Jan
28
2012
Funny Maternity Clothes
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From Here to Maternity: The Education of a Rookie Mom $2.19 At last, a deeply funny look at the modern motherhood experience-a book that lays it all on the changing table. When Beth Teitell first learned she was pregnant, her mind raced with important questions: Does a handful of Milk Duds count as a serving of calcium? Where do movie stars buy their maternity clothes, and is $95 way too much to spend on a cotton T-shirt if you’re not routinely-okay, ever-photographed by paparazzi? Then, just as she was beginning to imagine her maternity leave as a long, paid vacation from work, a time to catch up on reading and old movies, she was caught completely off guard-by the arrival of a baby. And then the trouble really began. From Here to Maternity offers a hilarious, highly perceptive look at the experience of becoming a mom, exposing the secrets of modern parenting that your doctor will fail to warn you about and your fellow mothers will be too embarrassed to admit. From learning The Rules for playdating other mommies, to figuring out the New Mommy Math (a half hour of educational TV only counts as ten minutes toward your child’s daily allowance), Teitell explores what it’s like to be a mother in a culture responsible for strollers that cost as much as a month’s rent. Chock-full of practical advice on motherhood’s biggest challenges-what to sing if you don’t know any lullabies (the Brady Bunch theme song is a perfectly valid choice); the delicate art of picking up babysitters; and the ethics of returning a baby gift in order to buy yourself a little present with the merchandise credit- From Here to Maternity tells it like it is with consummate style and laugh-out-loud irreverence. A winning, utterly original look at the lighterside of the most serious job on earth, From Here to Maternity is the ultimate treat for mothers everywhere-second only to a hot bath and the phone number of a good babysitter. |
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Maternity the Musical: Funny Songs about Cravings, Sonograms, and Everything Else an Expectant Mom with CD (Audio) $1.33 If motherhood is a sorority, then pregnancy is its nine-month hazing ritual. Weight gain, mood swings, unfashionable clothes: You need a good sense of humor to get through it all, even if you are the dad! Now there’s a great book to help you laugh-and sing-about all the embarrassing inconveniences leading up to the blessed event.Maternity the Musical! is a hilarious songbook of parody lyrics to favorite tunes, all about the true sighs and highs of pregnancy. Experienced mothers and mothers-to-be will be rolling on the floor with laughter and recognition at lyrics like these, sung to the tune of The Hokey Pokey : You take a short breath in, You let a short breath out, Because your lungs are squished, And you’re stuffy in your snout.You eat because you’re starving, And then you feel too full, You can’t get comfortable!Maternity the Musical! covers all of the ups and downs of pregnancy, from weird cravings and Lamaze class to the plethora of pregnancy advice and impossible-to-assemble baby equipment.Best of all, in addition to the illustrated lyrics pages, the book includes a sing-along CD with 10 songs with piano and voice accompaniment to guarantee audience participation. Maternity the Musical! is a riotous pregnancy sing-along sure to induce laughs (if not labor!) and be the hit of any baby shower. |
